QUI ROGAT, NON ERRAT

In 2008 I had an opportunity to visit Obama’s country. During my stay there, a friend invited me to dinner at an Italian restaurant. She is the principal of a high school in Fayetteville-North Carolina. She came with two persons that I later found out they were the vice-principals, while three Indonesian friends accompanied me.
When we reached the restaurant, the waitresses welcomed us friendly and asked us to sit at table number four. Afterward, they gave us the menu list. As it was an Italian restaurant, the names of the menu were in Italian. I don’t know Italian at all, so I called a waitress and asked her to describe the kinds of food offered. I ordered seafood -that I felt it’s safe and familiar. One of my Indonesian friends who sat next to me whispered, “Just choose the menu, don’t ask too much, never let you look liked hick”.
"So let them think I'm a hick!  It’s better than falling in trouble with food", I grumbled.
"Look! There is no one asked about the menu, except you are!"
I just smiled. I glanced towards the others. Apparently, they did not see anything strange to me. At least that what I thought so.
While waiting for the food that we ordered, we talked about education, culture, and many others. About 15 minutes later, our order came. As I had imagined, shrimps, squids, and mussels served on my plate. It smelled delicious…..Hmm… Yummy…!
I took a look at my friend's plate. There’s such as meat cut into pieces in a circle-shaped.
He whispered, “Looks great, doesn’t it? Not like yours, shrimps? It’s too ordinary!”
We started having our dinner. In the time I had a mouthful, suddenly he treaded my foot, “Goddamned!”  He sputtered.
“What’s up?” I replied.
 “It’s not meat.…. It’s eggplant!”
I just could refrain from laughing……..
The story above is a real example of the Indonesian proverb “Malu Bertanya Sesat Di Jalan”. Embarrassed to ask will result in getting lost, in Latin it says Qui rogat, non errat (who asks, doesn't err).
Have you ever noticed that sometimes we are embarrassed by asking questions to clarify something? The shame of it arises because we don’t want to look stupid in front of others, or because we felt it was understood.
However, which is more difficult? to answer or to ask? I said: “to ask”. When you are in an exam and you face the questions that really do not know the answer, just answer, "sorry, I do not know" or leave it blank. That's better than having to bother friends for help. When you face a question of your younger sister/brother or your junior which you don't know the answer,  say, ”I don't know, but I know how to get the answer to your question”. It is the most appropriate answer rather than pretend to know or answer at will.
In fact, we can answer any questions. Right or wrong, satisfactory or not for the questioner, that's another problem. But, not everyone can ask.
Thus, “learning to ask” is important. Asking is a skill that must be honed and brought upon, especially for the learners. A person's ability can be measured by their ability to ask. People who rarely ask, though only ask in their own mind, the development of their intellect and spirituality will run slow.
Unfortunately, in some places to ask is often regarded as a disgrace or shame. And worse, because to ask constituting a strangeness, students who inquire often considered pretentious by his friends.
Unbelievable………!